I really feel as if I'm closing a chapter of my life over the next couple of days as I prepare to move out of our condo. We bought this place just months after getting married. It's in a really young, hip neighborhood close to downtown, restaurants and bars. We took advantage of it all and really loved living the lifestyle that this place afforded us. After a few years living that lifestyle we slowly started talking about kids. Eventually that gave way to trying to start a family. Our plan was to see how things went and then move to a house when the time came.
Well, as we all know, the starting the family part didn't go as swimmingly as we had hoped and then started the years of trying and fertility treatments. Medical procedures, acupuncture, massage and medications are not inexpensive so we decided to stay put. Fertility treatments evolved into adoption and we decided that we really needed to stay put and save up for awhile.
I loved the beginning years of living in our place and being newly married and carefree. The last few years of living here don't have the same happy memories for me. It really reminds me of the waiting and the uncertainty of our situation. The setting up of a baby room only to have it dismantled. This place is beginning to make me feel as if I'm in a permanent holding pattern, forever stagnating in the lifestyle of my late 20s.
On Saturday I'll be packing up and moving out of our condo. It's bitter-sweet but I'm really looking forward to closing this chapter in our lives. I know that the next place we move to will see a baby in it and I'm ready to start that chapter of my life. I'll miss the great lifestyle this place afforded me but I'm even more looking forward to the new chapter that lies ahead.
July 9, 2009
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I'm excited for you!! Your new home is beautiful. Good luck with the move.
ReplyDeleteI could have written this same exact post about 6 months ago...actually, I think I wrote something that echoed your feelings right before we moved. Bittersweet is how I would describe it too. But you still have many great memories to make and this new house will be part of them. Good luck with your move!
ReplyDeleteHere's the post I was referring to http://finallyababyforus.blogspot.com/2008/11/packing-up-houseand-our-dreams.html
ReplyDeleteI think yours summed up the experience much better!
Congrats! I believe that if you want something to come into your life, you have to make room for it. I know you and J had a nursery in your condo, and I hope that letting go of the place that signifies your childless life and stepping into your new family home will bring you what you want the most--and fast! Lynn
ReplyDeleteGood luck with your move. You hit the nail on the head - the uncertainty of infertility and adoption really makes life difficult. Yay for a clean break from your condo and looking forward to a new chapter!
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