Today is the day that I have been looking forward to for years and the day that has also kept me up at night. I sometimes wonder if I have the strength to do this but today will answer that question.
We were lucky to have a room at the hospital down the hall from K and J. Nora spent the night with them last night and Joel and I crammed into a twin hospital bed. I woke up this morning with a sense of overwhelming joy mixed with overwhelming sorrow. My heart is breaking for K and J this morning and I know that there is nothing that I or anyone else can do to help them through this. I want them to have as much time with Nora as they want or need today. I quickly gave her a bottle and then it's their time until we are all discharged later today and have our placement ceremony.
This is such a hard, bitter-sweet experience. There is so much joy and beauty mixed with so much sorrow. I don't know where I am going to find the strength to have K hand me Nora today.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
Posts
My prayers and heart are with all of you today. I Love You!
ReplyDeleteJust breathe.
ReplyDeleteMy thoughts are with you!
- L
You are in our thoughts and prayers...while you may experience great sorrow, may you also find the strenght to embrace the joy...thinking of you...
ReplyDeleteYou're in my thoughts. I hope that things go great today despite how bittersweet the moment truly is.
ReplyDeleteHere from LFCA
Im here from LFCA. Our (domestic adopted also) daughter is almost 2.5y old and what you're describing still seems like yesterday. It's brining tears to my eyes.
ReplyDeleteIt IS hard. And driving away from the hospital was hard. But....I had to tell myself that she would have been placed with or without us, and that we were her parents, chosen by her first mom and dad, and we were what was best for her because we were committed to doing it RIGHT. You'll do great.
Congratulations! Enjoy your new little one!
I was just in this situation myself 2 Saturdays ago. I'm sure you will be blown away by the grace your birth family shows, just as we were. It takes special people to give their children up for adoption, and it takes special people to take them home. Don't you feel lucky to be in such a blessed position? :) Best of luck, hugs, and prayers.
ReplyDeleteOver from LFCA. As A said, you will be amazed at the grace of the birth family. My little one's first mother was amazingly strong. Your sensitivity to their needs is extremely important, they are entrusting you with not only their child, but the dreams they have for their child. I think about my child's first parents everyday and it sounds like you will too. Trust me, it's not a bad thing. Caring about others is always a good thing and will make you a wonderful mother. God Bless.
ReplyDeleteSending positive energy your way! You, Joel, K, J, and baby Nora are all exactly where you are supposed to be.
ReplyDeleteBless your heart for acknowledging their grief. In adoption there is always loss on someones part and it is bittersweet. I pray for peace in your heart (as well as J&K's). The true love that surrounds Baby Nora is incredible, isn't it?
ReplyDeleteThank you for sharing your wonderful journey w/ us.. keep the updates coming!!
Found your blog thru another. Adopted our daughter four years ago domestically at birth...these days right now are priceless even though they are so hard..my daughter loves hearing the story of what happened at the hospital the day she was born. Take lot's of pictures, you really will cherish them in the future..
ReplyDeleteThinking of all of you at this time..
Thinking of and sending strength to all of you.
ReplyDelete