January 20, 2010

Failed Adoption

Exactly one year ago today I was an expectant mom waiting to meet our daughter and her birth mother, A, for the first time. If you know me or follow my blog, you'll know that I don't have a one year old. That adoption was not meant to be and A changed her mind before we got to the hospital. I'll likely not remember this date in the future, but, it does stand out in my mind because it was the day that President Obama was sworn into office and our almost-daughter was African American. It felt like such a momentous day to me on so many levels and it has stuck with me a year later.

My intention of posting this is to provide hope to everyone who is waiting or who has been through the heart break of a failed match. I now have a beautiful daughter, Nora, who will be 4 months old next week and I couldn't be happier. It's so interesting to see what can happen in a year. If nothing else, adoption teaches you that you don't have much control and your life can change in an instant. In our case, that was for the better in September.

9 comments:

  1. Thank you so much for posting this and giving hope! Your Nora is beautiful!

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  2. That was so beautiful as is your precious Nora! Its amazing how little control we have in the adoption process yet we go onward trusting and it always ALWAYS turns out far better than our minds could have ever conceived!

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  3. This is so true! I used to work in adoption and domestic adoption is especially hard because you don't have any control, you're right!

    I'm so glad your dream was able to come true!

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  4. Just that picture alone helps give me hope....very cute. Thanks Jen;)

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  5. Yes it is so interesting how the twists and turns change and mold us into the people we are. I think, though the situation is very different, people who have miscarriages and then go on to have future children feel similarly. That just wasn't meant to be for some reason. And if it had been, you wouldn't have the amazing little person you now love so much in your life. Pretty unbelievable when you think about it!

    Melba

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  6. I found your blog through a few of my friends and just wanted to say hello!

    I have read through some of your blogs and I couldn't picture another baby as your child. I'm going to keep that in mind if god forbid we have a failed matched. Thank you for sharing.

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  7. Beauitful post. We learned quickly just how much God is in control of things during our adoption process.

    I'm very interested in your review of your friends novel. It's hard to find stuff about raising a biracial child, I can only think of one book I have that discusses it. Thanks for the heads up.

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  8. That is wonderful. We are dealing with a birth mother who is having some second thoughts right now, and so your story is good to hear.

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